Weathering the storms

As most people do in life my family is going through some growing pains. My long time love (not my husband, cuz we are too cool to get married...lol) hates the job that he took about six months ago, and before that he was really unhappy at the last one due to commute and feeling like he just wanted something different...better. Well he learned the hard way that the grass is not always greener on the other side and it has been the worst career mistake he has ever made. That being said it has been a huge stain at home, he has been moody and really hard to be around. He hasn't been himself and that makes me have to carry the bulk of the work that has to do with home and family. The relationship has changed, we don't even sleep in the same room anymore. I love him because we have been together for 13 years, and I stick with him because that is what a good wife does, she stands behind her man and his decisions...no matter what. That's how I was raised.

But what happens when those decisions cause all sorts of unrelated problems?? Do you stay because you're suppose to, or because you want to, or because you have no where else to go??? I have really been struggling, and when I mention going to talk to someone about it, I just get the answer that he won't go, and if we are at that point what is the point of going?? I feel like his unhappiness is sucking the life out of me. It is taking away from our kids and its like a dark cloud over our family. He is impatient with the kids and I constantly feel like I have to referee them all. I know that I am not the only woman going through things like this and that others have it far worse than I do, but what about my happiness??? What about my girls?? I just feel like there is no one who can just give me an answer and man thats all i really want.

I have these days where I feel like he is a stranger and we dont even know each other any more. Do I even like him anymore?? The fighting gets to be so much and who wants to live this way really? I am the type of person who usually keeps all this in, but who the hell will really read this any way and what difference does it really make?? Well getting it out helps I guess, so to all those who are struggling like me...hang in there, the sun will shine again....